Live With A Laughing Heart

Too often, life stumbles by us as we’re caught up in the anxiety of the future and the tasks of today. These intrusive thoughts rob our peace of mind by clouding what is most important — the present.

We lose sight that everything will be alright.

The poem ‘A Laughing Heart’ by Bukowski radiates inspiration on this. Often a dark writer, he reminds us that a light laughing heart remains key to true happiness.

Living with a laughing heart is to live a life of defiance. To make a willing choice to remove online distractions and laments about the future to focus on what matters most. You must choose daily what matters most to you or society will choose it for you. As Bukowski says, ‘your life is your life.’

Life will burden each person with unique struggles. There are enough present struggles without trying to fix past mistakes or control future outcomes. Looking out of the present, shamefully ruing the past, or anxiously awaiting the future serves no purpose in the end anyway. Your chance to be better is in the now.

Even at the darkest points, light can be found. It may not be much but it is always there. A laughing heart is able to relinquish control and find beauty in all moments. Even at the worst points, a laughing heart is at peace because it knows it will be fine. Even on days filled with failure, there are more chances tomorrow.

A laughing heart represents all of this but it is one thing above all else — true to itself.

Taking responsibility to understand individual values and execute on those values drives a happy content life. To think life flows towards your ideal state without work is pointless. A laughing heart moves confidently towards an identified end state with its actions. Actions and ideas I’ve begun embracing in my daily life to move towards my ideal state are:

- Sometimes work can wait.

- My family is more important than work

- There is always a tomorrow if I fail or was not as good as I wanted to be today

- Being the most present father with my children is priceless

- I’m worth the time it takes to meditate every day

- Building healthy physical and mental fitness yields just as many dividends as more money

- I will never be able to accurately predict the future. My anxiety about it will almost always be overstated or plain false

- Even in the worst of times, I will make it through

Fulfillment grows as these are implemented in my daily life. Through success comes confidence. As I see my relationships grow stronger, I garner more faith in the choices I’ve made. While we may not beat death in the end, we beat it in the present through this type of focused fulfillment.

This becomes even more relevant during COVID and chaotic United States presidential elections. Extra stressors are bearing down on all of us. Through some unprecedented events, many lives have tumbled into unknown territory. It is a scary time. Many of us have found ourselves in a situation we never thought we’d be in. Remembering what we can control is critical. As someone who lost his job via COVID, I’ve had ample time to reflect. I know I cannot change it all but maybe I don’t need to:

- I cannot know when my next job offer will be but I can get off the computer and play in my children’s imaginative worlds

- I cannot sway the political climate but I can put down my phone and be present with my wife

- I cannot know the trajectory of life but I can enjoy every moment on the path there

By choosing to embrace the present, we become free. If we have portions of our life we want to change, we can do it at any moment. The past remains almost irrelevant as we have the option to change at any given time. Those chances to change always present themselves. The train always comes back around again.

Our life is our life and it is our responsibility to live it while we have it. Live it in a way that is true to ourselves. Instead of being caught up in stress, driven by uncontrollable events, we can choose to be present. Too often, we miss the point of life by focusing on time frames and factors outside of it. The light shines; always there in our present.

you are marvelous

the gods wait to delight

in you

Bukowski, Charles. The Laughing Heart

Originally published at https://workingmanszen.com on October 15, 2020.